Hey Seawolves, Gossip Girls here, and we are here to inform you of all the juicy stories and rumors going on at this school. We have weekly gossip stories that range from bad first dates to funny social app posts. We’ll be posting weekly, our ears all always open, fill out this google form or email us at beaconthesmcc@gmail.com.

Disclaimer: All these stories are anonymous and names have been changed to protect anonymity.

Dates from Hell

Funny date stories that happened here at SMCC!

College students and dating, two things that don’t mix well. Have you ever been on a bad date? Well here are some bad date stories that have been sent it. 

• “I went out with this guy from SMCC and it was one of the most uncomfortable couple hours of my life. Here’s what happened, he didn’t tip the waitress, only talked about himself and cars, lots of awkward silence, made a comment about not liking “girly girls”, and then told me his rules; don’t cheat and have fun. Let’s just say, there wasn’t a second date.

• “Ever been out with an admitted drug dealer? Well I have. I went out with this guy on campus, and we drove around. Within 20 minutes he openly admitted to taking hard drugs, selling them, and driving while doing them. He was driving me in the car. He also told me he had been pulled over 11 times. Unfortunately, that wasn’t our last date.

• I have a story of a first and last date. I went out with this guy on campus to a restaurant. Let’s call him Andy. Well when Andy picked me up and I said he looked nice, he said “Oh I know.” The conversation at the dinner wasn’t great and I just wanted to leave. When the waitress came over and asked if we were splitting the check or sharing, he screamed at her “WE ARE SPLITTING”. The whole restaurant heard him yell that at her and it was single handedly the most embarrassing moment of my life. The best part was I was planning on paying for him, after that I told him I never wanted to see him again.

• I, at the time a 20 year old trans male, in July of 2023 had recently broken up with my boyfriend. Drunkenly one night, my friend Dave ended up confessing his love for me and I confessed my love to him as well. After the confessions we were told the next day that we had made out for a solid 10-15 minutes.The next morning he told me we needed to talk. When we got to the room he sat me down and told me that we CANNOT be in a relationship because he is not gay or bisexual. Then proceeded to tell me that the only way he could be with me is if I detransition back to a female… bro what?? So after I tell him that I am absolutely NOT doing that, he says ok and hugs me goodbye. About a week after all of this, I found out he at the time had a girlfriend.

You kiss your mother with that mouth?

Things that people have said/texted others that have been sent it that will leave you in shock.

• After this guy went out with my best friend, he matched with me on a dating app and texted me “the hot friend.”

• A guy has been texting me non stop and I have been very dry because I’m not interested. I would respond days later “sorry just seeing this” and he responded “Probably because you hate meeee.”

• I broke up with this guy I was seeing and after I did he said “This is probably for the best because I have been tempted to cheat on you everyday.”

Class Clowns Collective

Funny SMCC campus stories.

• My friend and I were taking a new class together but we were late the first day because we couldn’t find parking. When we got to the class the teacher had locked the door on us.

• I was in the middle of a zoom class and our cameras had to be on. A guy came up to me and hit on me while the class was going on. Everyone saw and it was quite embarrassing.

• There was a lady biking on campus and she fell in the middle of the road, then when she finally got back on her bike she started screaming at students for being in “her way”. 

SMCC Social Slip Ups

Real and Funny SMCC social app postings.

• “I am straight, but red apples be so good.”
• Posted in Buy & Sell: “anyone want my spine?”
• “Whoever yanked my laundry out of the Sprinpoint dryer, I hate you, it wasn’t even done yet.”
• “Are the gym hours actually posted anywhere? Or is it just a crap shoot.”
• “Anyone wanna start a coven with me” – Your local smcc witch.
• “Some of you bitches are crazy af and into some nasty shit; Where is your dignity? Your self-respect? Your number? What’s your address? You free tonight?”

That’s all for this week Beaconers, be sure to keep your eyes out for next week’s post. Remember, send in your stories to include either through our google form, or send us an email beaconthesmcc@gmail.com