Arts & Culture

Funny Jokes

By Loraine Aceto

Laughter is the best medicine! Best Life Online says, “Laughter relaxes the whole body, boosts the immune system, releases endorphins, protects the heart, burns calories, may help a longer life, strengthens relationships, and even prevents heart disease, improves mood, relieves stress, etc.” Perfect whether for cracking up with your college pals, making your grandma smile, breaking ice, and spreading some joy, here is a collection of face 3funny jokes to have a few laughs!

My professors told me I’d never amount to much because I procrastinate so much.
I told them, “Just you wait!”
(Best Life Online)

 

cat face‘A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse.
“But why?” they asked, as they moved off.
“Because,” he said “I can’t stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.”’
(Daily Mail Co – Researcher’s Official Funniest Jokes of All time)

A chicken walks into the library. It goes up to the circulation desk and says: “book, bok, bok, boook”. The librarian hands the chicken a book. It tucks it under his wing and runs out. A while later, the chicken runs back in, throws the first book into the return bin and goes back to the librarian saying: “book, bok, bok, bok, boook.” Again the librarian gives it a book, and the chicken runs out. The librarian shakes her head. Within a few minutes, the chicken is back, returns the book and starts all over again: “boook, book, bok bok boook.” The librarian gives him yet a third book, but this time as the chicken is running out the door, she follows it. The chicken runs down the street, through the park and down to the riverbank. There, sitting on a lily pad is a big, green frog. The chicken holds up the book and shows it to the frog, saying: “Book, bok, bok, boook”. The frog blinks, and croaks: “read-it, read-it, read-it”.    (Jokes of the Day)

Q: What do you call a pile of kittens?

A: A meow-ntain
(heard from Melissa McCarthy)

face

Another one was:
“Doc, I can’t stop singing the ‘Green Green Grass of Home”’.
The doctor said:
‘That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome’.
‘Is it common?’ I asked.
‘It’s not unusual’ he replied.

(Daily Mail Co – Researcher’s Official Funniest Jokes of All time)

 

Categories: Arts & Culture

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