by Hali Sarah Parsons
What’s up y’all? I wanted to write this article for the Beacon to remind people to be who they are. Of course it is inevitable to be who you are because how could you really be something you are not? However, there is a part of who we are that is our essence—something that makes us unique.
Often times people forget that part of themselves because of their experiences. For example, if you work a lot, you may forget to have fun and relax as an adult. For me, I faced serious trauma when the state placed my three children in a foster home after birth and framed me to be an unfit parent. From then on, I wanted to prove that I could have raised them by myself and try to become a professional, like the ones used in court to support their case.
I recently started working for a disabled lady in her home from a flyer that was posted on campus this semester. After three weeks, she asked me why I was studying medical terminology because I told her my passion was music. She told me, I don’t need to prove anything to anyone and that I should focus on what I really enjoy as a career which reminded me that the time is now.
Although I still make time for everything and claim to enjoy being so busy, she does not believe it. Continuing her pep-talk, she highlighted the fact that I could continue to try and learn everything, but times are changing.
As we know, once we get our degree, our fields will keep changing and we have to keep learning. It was something I didn’t want to hear because I knew it a long time ago. Right after high school, I went to college in Los Angeles and studied fashion, music and acting. Then love interfered and I tried to have a family.
Growing up, I self-taught myself through books and research on spirituality and psychology, which is why I made certain choices with my children that challenged social norms. Today I see alternative medicine becoming mainstream, and it breaks my heart that it wasn’t there to support me through my case from 2014-2016. Because my children were (in a sense) being held collateral, my heart was on the line.
Everyone who was involved became their gate-keepers and I was out to prove myself to them (like women do with their boyfriends when their relationship becomes unhealthy). Since I began taking classes at SMCC in 2015, I have completed an associates in Political Science, Horticulture and after this semester, I will have one in Communications and New Media Studies.
Although the lady I work for does not know my full story, she told me to let it go. Truthfully, there is nothing I can do now to change what has happened. She’s right—I have to start fully living for myself again. I just need to be me, instead of trying to be everything.