We’ve heard the phrase “he has that dog in him,” or seen someone extremely driven and wondered where they got that from. There are people you see who work hard, and you admire them from a far and think it is just in them. Then there is me right now, thinking I might just be doomed because after a hard year, I do not have that much drive, grit, or motivation for much or to succeed. So here I am doing some research, trying to figure out if I will have a turning point or if I’ll be stuck like this.

Throughout my childhood and before graduating high school, I did not have much drive for anything. I think it was because I had not found something that made me want to push myself. Later on, I did find that feeling, whether it was creatively or financially, and during that time I could say I had that drive. But now after a hard year I am wondering again is this something you have to be born with? Can you have it without motivation or can you create it?

One way to understand this is through the idea of a growth mindset. According to Carol Dweck, a growth mindset means that abilities can improve through effort and persistence. Instead of thinking you either have drive or you do not, it suggests you can build it by trying, learning, and not giving up.

Motivation does not always come first. Sometimes action comes before motivation. As Mark Manson explains, “Action isn’t just the effect of motivation, but also the cause of it”. He also says if you feel stuck, you should “do something, anything really,” because even small actions can start building motivation.

There are also ways to actually grow that drive. You can start by valuing effort instead of expecting perfection, and by seeing failure as something to learn from instead of something negative. Using the word yet, like saying, “I am not good at this yet,” can also help you stay focused on improving instead of giving up. Practicing self- compassion and treating yourself like you would a friend can also help you keep going during hard times. So maybe having that dog in you is not something you have to be born with. It can be built, lost, and rebuilt depending on your mindset, actions, and experiences.

Photo by Nubelson Fernandes on Unsplash